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May 022010
 

by
Mary Ellen Elias

Twenty-five years later and
all they could remember
was the giant erection
in the boys’ shower room
after 8th grade gym class.

The moniker stuck
As well as the distinction of being
“The only gay guy” in their graduating class.
The only one who got caught with his pants down
And his boner on.
‘Course, there were no Blacks
Hispanics and hardly any Jews.

Minorities were a minority
In this bedroom community
with wall-to-wall white bread
The kind that came wrapped in primary colored
polka-dot packaging
and sometimes
Gave you a bonus plastic
Rain bonnet,
the adult Cracker Jack gift

But I digress
While Bob regressed
Dressed in an ‘I Hate Anita Bryant’
Fruit Tee
from the ‘70s
Iggy Pop leather pants and
A Huck-A-Poo disco shirt.
Wrap it up!

He was never into high school
But liked seeing how everyone who
had tortured him
Was now straddled with mid-age paunch and bald pates

And though he lost the perm,
Light brown hair with streaks of blond
Still waved hello on his head.

Take that assholes!
The best revenge is fitting into your
clothes twenty-five years later.
And, knowing you were man enough
not to hide.

  One Response to “Boner Bob”

  1. Loved it. Who was the classmate?